Ginny stepped cautiously into the main entrance of Hogwarts, watching and listening for signs of her colleagues. She wasn't doing anything wrong, she knew; but all the same she wasn't especially in the mood to meet anyone along the way, nor to answer any questions about the old trunk she levitated before her.
She took a few steps in the direction of Gryffindor tower. Stopped. Listened.
Maybe it was just her nerves, but something felt... off.
Draco was tired. That was the only thing that could explain his missing a trunk being levitated about 30 yards in front of him and the redhead levitating it.
She must have made some noise that had drawn him out of his thoughts. He'd been mentally working his way over the day and what he was missing in breaking down the curses of the day. There was a particularly difficult curse on an old amethyst and silver necklace. And he felt like he had missed something when going over everything on location today. He'd heard a scrape, though, and suddenly looked up. And there it was ... an old trunk floating in front of an unmistakably female redhead.
Draco debated how fast he could move into the shadows. He had permission to be here, but he was supposed to avoid any staff that didn't know he was here. That included one who could only be Ginevra Weasley.
Ginny raised her eyes from the trunk and scanned the area.
There. A figure poised -- hesitating -- as if interrupted mid-thought, or mid-step. A man, and not one she recognized. She felt certain he'd marked her, too.
Her grip tightened ever-so-slightly on her wand.
"May I help you?" she called out, politely professional. There was every chance he was there on legitimate business. He'd made it this far through Remus's wards, after all.
Draco had no choice. He'd been spotted. Well, it was possible that she might not recognize him. Having filled out some and changed his hair would help the ten years of time that had passed ease the memory of his brash, blond self from the youngest Weasley's mind. He could only hope.
"No. Thank you. I'm staying with a friend here and am on my way to his quarters now."
He hoped that she wouldn't inquire further and that, perhaps, if he continued on about his business and just acted as if her presence had startled him ... well, he just hoped he got lucky.
Ginny may not have recognized his figure, but she never forgot a voice. Especially not that voice.
The levitating trunk fell to the floor with a loud, echoing thunk; at the same time, Ginny's wand flicked up and sideways, a hard slash toward the young man.
"EXPELLIARMUS!"
Draco had a half a heartbeat to make his decision.
One circle of his wand later ... "PROTEGO!"
He could feel the impact of Weasley's magic against his shield. He'd barely been able to get it up in time.
There was no way to get around her and he didn't fancy a fight. He'd feel like a coward, though, if just started hollering Remus' name. And while he didn't want to run, either, he just didn't see anything else working.
He supposed he could try calmly talking to her ... after disarming her of course.
He whipped his own wand up and sideways, with a final hard slashing thrust and responded in kind. "EXPELLIARMUS!
The breath rushed out of him all at once and he held his wand, ready to execute a Mobilicorpus spell to keep her still while he talked.
Ginny had the advantage of being ready. One circle of her wand, and she'd thrown a Protego of her own. Wordlessly.
He hadn't actually tried to hurt her yet, though, so she held off on trying to surround him in flames. Or charging him. But she kept her wand poised, ready to respond to the slightest twitch from him.
"You're supposed to be dead," she said. Even at this distance, he could see the dangerous glint in her eye, the set of her jaw, suggesting she'd be willing to help him into that state if necessary. "Why are you here, Malfoy?"
Draco smiled. He was impressed. Apparently she'd added to her power in the last ten years. He reviewed that thought and decided on his own stupidity for assuming otherwise.
"The rumors of my death have been greatly exagerrated. I didn't lie. I am staying here with a friend and I am on my way to his quarters right now. Remus Lupin has me as his guest currently. I don't think that's the question you really want the answer to, though, is it?"
Draco's voice remained calm and even. Though tired, he was no slouch in taking care of himself. If he needed to, he'd run to the edge of the wards and owl Remus for help later, but for now ... he'd try to calmly talk this out.
"It will do for now. Perhaps you'd like an escort." Ginny's tone and body language made clear that this was a condition of entry rather than a friendly offer. She gestured minutely for him to approach, still with her wand at the ready.
Draco was torn between smiling and sighing. He was impressed at her reign on the infamous Weasley temper, but frustrated that it seemed more and more people were identifying him easily.
"Professor Weasley, I would enjoy nothing more than to see Remus' face as you escort me to his rooms. Please ..."
Draco gestured for her to take his arm as an 'escort' would, but truly expected her to insist on following him at the end of her wand.
Draco was not wrong. She gestured for him to lead the way. As he passed, he heard the scrape of the trunk being levitated again, and then Ginny's footsteps following a short distance behind him.
Remus heard the scrape of the trunk and footsteps coming toward his rooms, too. He opened the door just before there was a chance to knock, looked from Draco to Ginny and sighed.
"Please, come in." He stepped back so they could come in and resisted the urge to roll his eyes.
Draco, having stayed with Remus for a few days now, could almost see the roll waiting in Remus' eyes. He gave a shrug and walked on in, beginning to pull off his outer robes for the day and make himself comfortable as if he belonged there, which, in a sense, he did.
"I was very clear with Professor Weasley here that I was staying, with permission, with a friend here. She seemed to think I was still a danger, though." Draco looked up from where he had just sat as he calmly finished his explanation. "She offered me her services as an escort and here we are."
Ginny brought her trunk to rest on a spot just inside the door. Remus noticed as it levitated past him that it was labeled "Dolls and Clothes" in a childish hand; however, to his heightened sensitivities, it smelled unmistakably of Harry.
Ginny sat straddling the trunk, folded her arms, and looked up at Remus as if expecting an explanation -- or at least a good reason not to lay into Draco.
Remus was busy trying to figure out why that truck smelled of Harry. He tilted his head at Ginny a little, not quite openly questioning but in that moment of remembering, sensing in a way that was so very nearly tangible, Draco ceased to exist.
He shook his head, very slightly and tried to understand. "Draco obviously isn't dead. He's been sending Moody information about Bellatrix for several months and was able to prove that he was Alastor's source. His story will be further confirmed by Adrian and ultimately he'll be staying with Hagrid."
All that came out while he was still looking at Ginny, clearly thinking about something else and not asking the question that was right there in front of him.
Draco nodded along, agreeing with what Remus was saying, only half listening because he already knew the story. He was still debating taking off his shoes and making himself comfortable for the night versus the possibility that this might all be hauled up before Professor ... no, Headmistress McGonagall. He did catch one thing to correct, though.
"Actually, I've been Alastor's source for years now. Pretty much since right after I healed up." There was a heartbeat before the rest of what Remus said caught up to him.
"What? Staying with Hagrid?" His voice got a touch louder and shriller. "When was this decided? I mean, I knew I couldn't stay hiding here forever, but with Hagrid?" Draco barely reigned his inner 17-year-old in from adding insults to the equation.
Remus looked at Draco to answer the... not quite tirade or tantrum, precisely. He spoke evenly but firmly, sounded like a professor.
"He's nearby, he's not physically in the castle, and I promise you, Draco, he's not going to put you in a pot, boil you and have you for dinner. If you're not happy with that it's something you need to take directly to Minerva. You should also be aware that if you do it's entirely possible you'll be even more restricted and further removed from Hogwarts, but you're a big boy and beyond me saying where you're not staying, it's in your hands."
Then it was back to Ginny. "I'm sorry, you were saying?"
"Before or after 'Shut up, Malfoy' and 'So does this mean I don't get to set him on fire, then?'" Ginny gazed levelly at Remus, but a tiny flame appeared at the end of her wand to punctuate that last.
She shifted her gaze to Draco. Her eyes narrowed. She desperately wanted to dismiss him, but she wouldn't have him wandering about the grounds unsupervised. On the other hand, the other option -- dismissing him to Remus's bedroom -- didn't exactly sit well with her, either.
Draco sat gaping at both of them for a moment.
Then, looking back and forth between the two of them, he spoke evenly. "Gryffindors."
Clearly, this wasn't going to be the end of this discussion, but he was prepared to take up the issue of where we'd eventually be staying with the Headmistress directly.
"Gryffindors," Remus agreed, but with fondness rather than disdain. He did not look away from Ginny. "You can't set him on fire. I'm sorry, it would upset Minerva and you know how she gets when she doesn't get her way."
He rubbed the back of his neck. "Ginny and I need to have a discussion, Draco. Would you prefer to take a walk or go to bed?"
"Or we could send for Hagrid now," Ginny offered agreeably. "I hear he's got a new batch of blast-ended skrewts I'm sure he could use a hand with." Her posture relaxed fractionally.
Draco's nostrils flared as he took yet another calming breath and refused to rise to Weasley's bait.
"Privacy, I am sure is tantamount to your discussion. Therefore, me napping in the other room until dinner will do noone any good. I have excellent hearing, I assure you."
Rubbing the back of his neck, he realized he was subconsciously mimicking Remus' actions. "I believe that the lake is beautiful this time of year. I'll go for a walk. Hopefully, I won't run into any other overzealous Gryffindors in the meantime."
"I have excellent wards," Remus assured him, "But a walk would be a good idea. If you do run into any overzealous Gryffindors just bring them back here."
He had a headache. He definitely had a headache. He really wanted to know what was in that trunk.
Draco stood, then. "I'm sure you do ... but rather than have anyone worried that the little Death Eater is listening to their conversation," this he addressed in Ginevra's direction, "I'll just take a walk and see you in a few hours."
Draco smoothed down his pants. He reached for where he'd placed his outer robes and pulled them back on. "If I run into any more overzealous Gryffindors, I'll just appeal to their sense of logic and curiousity and bring them back here to add to my collection." Drack smirked and moved out the door.
Draco took a moment outside Remus' door to slow his heartbeat down. He had realized that it had been racing since he'd run into Weasley in the corridor. After a deep breath, he pushed himself off of the wall and began to make his way outside.
He picked his way slowly and carefully through the corridors for fear of truly running into another overzealous Gryffindor. The next one might not listen to anything remotely resembling reason. He giggled to himself at that. Just the thought of any of the Weasleys listening to a Malfoy's reasoning. Truly, hell must be freezing over.
He finally relaxed on his way to the lake and began woolgathering about everything that happened in the last few days.
A pony sized dog with a cricket-bat-sized stick in its mouth bounds out of the forest, and seeing a new playtoy-mate, dashes towards Malfoy, large paws chewing up the turf. While the sight might prove intimidating to some, the sheer... doggyness, of her expression insured that she was mostly harmless.
She skids to a stop in front of Malfoy, drops the branch, and looks up expectantly.
The large dog that came bounding up to him threw Draco out of his private thoughts.
"What the ...?" Draco looked around, almost frantically for another person to be following the dog. "Where did you come from?"
The dog appeared to be expecting something. Draco looked at the branch the dog had dropped. It was a hefty size. "You've got to be kidding me. You want me to go play fetch?"
Draco sighed. He'd truly been reduced to madness, along with the rest of his mother's family, if he was talking to a dog. Shaking his head at himself, Draco bent over and hefted the stick up and threw it back in the direction of the forest.
He didn't wait for the dog to follow the branch, he picked up his pace and heading towards the lake.
Truffle pounded off after the stick, snatched it up, and trotted back to follow Draco.
A moment later, Hagrid emerged from the forest where Truffle had appeared. With a loud voice, he calls out. "Truffle, there you are. Sorry 'bout that... Mister. I had to floo off to Diagon Alley and she gets bored when I'm not around. Come on Truffle. Come on girl."
Truffle seems uninterested in Hagrid and gently nudges Draco with her nose.
Draco scratches behind her ears when the dog nudges him.
Standing at the edge of the forest was the last person he wanted to see right now. The very person he'd been informed that if he wanted to continue on at the safety of Hogwarts, that he'd be staying with.
He realized he needed to make some sort of response, though, rather than just turning tail and running, otherwise this could get much, much worse. He shrugged. "Truffle, eh? Well, she's a pretty girl for her size. I'll just be on my way back to my walk, then." And he took the stick from Truffle and threw it again, this time towards the side of Hagrid that was further away from him.
Hagrid smiles and says, "yeah, she is. Have a nice walk then." Hagrid walks over to where Truffle had picked up the stick. He scratches her under the chin and says, "not everyone wants to play with you, ya silly mutt."
But wheels churn, even slow ones. It's dusk, the hair is wrong, and it's been close to ten years. Hagrid calls out, "Oi there. Hold up a moment." Hand a little tighter on the head of the cane, Hagrid stumps towards the young man.
Hagrid came towards Draco again and Draco had to still his heart. Running at this point would do no good, he'd learned that one the hard way already. He turned back towards Hagrid and steered his path back towards the castle again. He grumbled under his breath. "I can see, I'm not likely to get my walk in tonight like I'd planned."
Addressing Hagrid more directly, "Yes? Is there something I can help you with?"
Hagrid's face screws up in anger and growls, "you." He's a little slower these days with the cane, but Hagrid's long legs start chewing up the sod as he runs towards Malfoy like a runaway freight train.
Truffle, thinking this is all a fun game, runs alongside Hagrid, a big grin on her muzzle.
Draco sees Hagrid start up to a full on run at him. He circles his wand again and shouts. "PROTEGO!"
When this doesn't slow Hagrid down much, if at all, he turns tail and starts to run back towards the castle and Remus' rooms.
Grumbling, "This is so not my day," he continued running at full speed.
Hagrid bounces off the shielding spell, though Truffle passes through it, happily running to catch up to Draco, then dashing back to Hagrid's side. He gets up. "How many Death Eaters did'ja bring with you this time, boy?"
He follows Malfoy into the castle, attempting to bring him down with a well-thrown rock, though it bounces off another shield.
Ginny watched Draco depart, and continued to stare after him until the door closed and she was certain he was out of earshot.
Her shoulders sagged. She looked up at Remus. "How long has he been here?" And when were you going to tell me? she did not add, though she was thinking it pretty loudly.
"Near a week," he said apologetically. "And I really did intend to tell you but frankly I haven't had time to move. Are you all right?" Pause. 'What's in the trunk?"
Remus could have a very one track mind, though not in the same way Draco did.
Ginny had opened her mouth to respond, but at that last question she shut it again and looked at Remus. Her shoulders tensed again. For several long moments she sat in silence, debating how -- or whether -- to answer.
"If you were anyone else, Remus," she said at last, "I'd tell you 'stuff for camp'. Which is true, in its way, but it's not the Truth."
She stared down at the top of the trunk, ran her fingers over the lettering on its lid. Then she stood, wordlessly, took a step back, and with a delicate motion of her wand began unraveling hexes that had been in place for almost nine years.
"No one but me would recognize the half-truth, anyway."
Remus turned toward her, leaned forward so his elbows were on his thighs and just watched her, silent and intent.
It took her several minutes to unwork the magic guarding the trunk. When it was done she knelt, flipped the latches, and raised the lid, almost reverently.
The inside looked like a typical student trunk: Remus could see textbooks; an old jumper or two; pieces of parchment; small boxes and other odds and ends; and neatly folded on top, a set of Quidditch robes in Gryffindor colors with a captain's badge on the chest.
"He came to the Burrow after his last year," she said in a small voice. Her expression had gone oddly blank. "I packed these up after... after...." She reached out and touched the laces of the Quidditch robe.
"Oh, Christ." Remus sat back in his chair and rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hand. He didn't need to actually see the contents to be hit by the wave of memory, and scent, so solid that Harry could have very nearly been standing there.
His expression wasn't blank, just largely hidden by his hands, until he got his arms back down and then he couldn't figure out what the hell to do with his hands. "What's this got to do with camp?" he asked, trying to be careful. He didn't reach for the trunk. He put his hand on Ginny instead, just lightly.
He had to be touching something.
"It's to help me get through, mostly. I think. It reminds me why we're doing it." She shifted her weight to press very slightly into Remus's hand, as a cat might. "I don't usually interact much with other people on... the day."
He pet her hair, fingers sliding along the length and then left it resting there, just simple contact. "Yes." He said simply, still looking a little blank. Sounding a little blank. He felt a little blank.
He exhaled slowly, measured and a little shuddering. "The memorial," he said suddenly, but not as randomly as it might seem. "Pisses me off."
Ginny raised her head, slowly, to look at him. Her expression lost some of its blankness. "Why?"
"Because it isn't one." He shook his head, just a little and met Ginny's eyes. "The whole wizarding world will stop and remember the Boy Who Lived and Died to Save The World. A fraction of them ever knew enough about Harry to grieve for him."
"Oh, Remus, I know...." Ginny's eyes blazed with sudden fire. "I mean, I even get why they do it, but it just rips my guts right out through my chest whenever I hear anyone talk about him like he's just some symbol, when he--- When he---"
She shut her eyes tightly and took a deep breath, trying to regain her composure.
"When he was a real person who never really got to grow up, or be a kid." He shook his head. "I know, Ginny."
He looked at her, just a little curiously. "Why do you do that?"
Ginny gave a tiny nod, and sniffled.
At his question, she took another deep breath. "D-do what?" She opened her eyes a tiny bit and looked warily up at Remus.
He slid out of the chair and down to the ground in front of the chair, back against it. He kept one knee up, put one hand on the trunk. "Why are you this guarded?"
"What, you want to see me naked?" There was nothing glib, nor flippant, nor even particularly sexual in Ginny's tone. She crossed her arms tightly across her chest, but met Remus's gaze and held it.
"Not particularly," he admitted. "I'm not going to even try to make you do anything," he said, stroking the wood of the trunk with his thumb. "I'm just curious about why."
Ginny watched Remus silently for a long moment. She seemed to be putting effort into keeping her breathing slow and even.
"I think the technical term is 'unresolved issues'," she said at last with a hint of a rueful smile. "There's a lot about those last days that I locked away when I packed this trunk. To bring it into the light--- I don't know, Remus. I'd end up throwing things, or... or crawling into your lap and bawling all over you. And I don't think either of us wants to see you covered in my snot."
"That's a vivid image," He said, with a very, very faint smile. "And I can't say it's an appealing one." He wrinkled his nose, just a little to highlight that it was the snot in particular he was talking about, not Ginny or the breakdown.
He stayed quiet for a bit, looking in the direction of the trunk and Ginny, but not quite focusing on either one. Then he stretched and the distant expression broke. "I really wish I kept quidditch equipment in here. It would make it easier for me to offer you something to throw, and I already sent Draco out, so bouncing Malfoy off the floor's right out of the question. You'll have to settle for talking to me and we'll risk the snot."
"Maybe I'll just look forward to bouncing Malfoy off the floor later." Ginny's expression took on a hint of sternness. "And we're not done talking about him, you know. I trust you, Remus, and I trust your judgement; but I don't trust Draco even as far as I can throw him. Seeing him here -- honestly, I'm tempted to check you for traces of Imperius Curse. Just to be sure."
She sighed, unfolded her arms, and shifted around to sit cross-legged, facing Remus. "It's hardly fair. You're always so strong for the rest of us. Who gets to be strong for you?" She reached out as if to lay a hand on his knee; but she hesitated, and let her hand drop to her own knee instead.
"Since I'm still leaving the school to you on the full moon and you'll have both Draco and forty children here, it might be in your best interest to be very, very, sure." He paused. "To be honest I don't like it, either, but I do believe what he's told me so far and if we can use him to figure out what the bloody hell his aunt is up to, I will."
He pulled one knee up and grinned. "You're allowed to touch me, Ginny. I really promise not to bite." He let the smile fade and shook his head. "It isn't a bartering system, it's community. " He paused. "Though a community with a lot of silence and unresolved issues."
"I--- I don't---" Ginny ran a hand roughly through her hair. "Gah, SPEAK, Ginny." She took a deep breath.
"Okay. Let's try it this way. When the bombs went off in London, I kept imagining... this guy, and this girl, that maybe had plans for that night, plans to sit down and talk about things, like they hadn't really had a chance to for a long, long time, only they had their jobs to go do first, and... and he never made it, and at the end of the day she's down at the pub, waiting, holding her breath...."
Ginny dropped her gaze to her lap. "The day before Godric's Hollow, he came and found me, alone. And he took my hand and said, 'Ginny, can I ask you something?' And I said, 'Is is about tomorrow?' and he said, 'No, it's about... after.' And I--- I said--- 'Then ask me day-after-tomorrow'." She covered her face with her hands. "And now... it's the end of the day, and I'm still down at the pub, holding my breath."
He watched her, quietly sympathetically while she ran up against the wall and then in typical Gryffindor - and Ginny - fashion forced her way through. It made him smile, just a little.
"Is it that you don't know what he was going to say or that you never got to hear him say it??" Remus asked, steadily.
Ginny uncovered her face and looked at Remus; tears rolled down her cheeks. "It's that I don't know whether letting him say it would've made a difference! And not just letting him say it, but letting him hear what I had to say, too. I didn't want to believe we might not get through it, even though I knew he might---" She scowled and slammed her fist into her own thigh.
"In my very darkest moments, I wonder if I kept from him the very thing that might've kept him alive."
He stroked her cheek, brushed away a tear with his thumb and then put his hand over her wrist - mostly so she couldn't hit herself again.
"Ginny, Harry knew very well that you loved him. And I'm almost as sure he knew that what you were trying to do was start the future with the future - and make him believe that he had one."
The tears continued to flow, faster now than before. "S-sorry, Remus," Ginny said with what was probably supposed to be a laugh, but came out as a sob. "Snot time."
She leaned into his shoulder and dissolved in shuddering sobs. After a moment's hesitation, her arms found their way around his waist.
He shook his head a little but pulled her into his lap completely and let her hold onto him while he stroked her hair. "I'm washable," he said softly and pet her hair, very lightly and rhythmically, just the surface and just because he had to do something and sushing her was certainly not an option.
He ached for these kids - all of them broke his heart. Ginny, somehow, really got to him. No, not somehow. He knew how and why.
It took Ginny a few minutes to cry herself back to a state of relative calm. When she'd caught her breath enough to speak again, she said, partly into Remus's shoulder, "So, next question. I'm in love with a dead man -- a dead man who's still there, everywhere I turn. How the hell am I supposed to let go and move on?"
He leaned his head back into the seat of his chair, looked at the ceiling but didn't try to move Ginny or move away from her. "I don't know. Admitting that you love him would. Probably be a good place to start. Tell everyone that will listen and make them believe it. Know, absolutely, that he loved you." He paused. "Do you want to know my secret?" he asked, with a wry smile.
Ginny lifted her head to look at him, and noticed the huge damp spot she'd left on his shirt. She rubbed at it with her thumb. "Yeah, what?" she asked softly.
He huffed a sigh and looked down. "When Sirius died I was more relieved than grief stricken."
That was not a flippant admission, on any level.
"You---" Ginny blinked in surprise. "Why?"
He laughed at her, just a little. "Because he was broken," he said wearily. "I don't know. It doesn't really matter, but. You trusted me enough to talk to me."
Ginny took another moment to process what he'd said; then she looked at him and nodded, solemnly. "I don't think there's anyone I trust more. For this sort of thing, anyway. Granted, it's been a while since last I played 'I showed you mine, now you show me yours'." She smiled, a little.
"That reminds me, though -- I think I have something of yours." She slid carefully off his lap and began rummaging through the open trunk.
"Please, never imply anything about mine while Draco is anywhere near me." He half-pleaded, but then he sat up a bit on one knee to watch her, curious and quiet.
"What, has he...? Oh." Ginny may not have figured everything out, but she'd at least figured something out. "No, I promise I won't. Not to him, nor anyone else for that matter--- Ah, here it is." She nodded and sat back on her heels. In her hand she had an old, folded, blank piece of parchment, which she held out to Remus.
'That's because no matter what else you are, you're a remarkably sane woman." He said absently.
He took it, slowly, and unfolded it. Then he smiled, though he looked for a minute like he might cry. "Thank you, Ginny," he said, very simply.
"Thank you," Ginny replied, gently. "I daresay it's saved more than one life, my idiot brothers' among them." She smiled fondly. "I figured possession would rightfully revert back to either you or Scabbers -- er, I mean, Wormtail -- and frankly I like you a lot better." She carefully closed the lid of the trunk and scooted back over to sit next to Remus.
"I like me a lot better, too, and that's saying something." He looked at it and then laughed. "This thing is going to outlast us all, I think." He stopped and looked at her, suddenly. "You should make your own."
Ginny's eyes widened. "Do you think---? That thing is wicked clever; I always figured it was way out of my league." She cocked her head, curiously. "May I ask which of you made it? Or was it a collaborative effort?"
He shook his head. "It's nothing you can't manage with some time." He grinned a little and remembered. "It was all of us. Maybe you could grab Hermione and Ron to work with you?"
"Maybe." Ginny grinned. "Did you lot bicker as much as those two?"
"Me? No. James and Lily may have given them a run for their money, though."
Ginny smiled wryly. "I recommend you not make that observation to them, though. One of them might punch you."
Her expression grew pensive. "If you don't mind my asking... what was Lily like?"
He laughed, just a little, and stretched a bit, back down to sit with his back against the chair. "Probably Hermione," he said with amusement.
He thought about it, really thought about it. His expression went a little distant. "Intense. Opinionated. Bossy. Occasionally loud. One of the most loving, accepting and giving people I have ever known. " He stopped and laughed, just a bit. "You'd have loved her or hated her, I think. Probably loved."
"She sounds a bit like my mum, actually," Ginny said, and smiled.
She hesitated, and continued in a tone that sounded a bit like a confession: "Once, at Number Twelve, Sirius--- I think he'd had a bit too much to drink, and he was sort of moping by the fire--- He mistook me for her. Just for a minute. I was never quite sure what to make of that." She hesitated again. "I get why you liked him."
"You remind me a bit of her, too. Even without the drinking." He tilted his head a little. "Why? I mean I know why I liked him, but what makes you say that?"
...Draco Who? What? Bellatrix? This was, painful and perfect.
"Well, he was magnetic, wasn't he?" Ginny replied, matter-of-factly. "And yes, I realize that's filtered through the perceptions of a fourteen-year-old girl, who could've got a sexual charge from linoleum, but still. He was brave, and brash, and smart, and funny when he wanted to be, and unafraid to speak his mind, and fiercely loyal to the people he cared about, and oh, God, I'm no longer sure whether I'm describing Sirius or his godson...." Ginny gave Remus a melancholy smile. "They even sort of moped the same, you know?"
Remus was startled into a grin and a soft huff of laughter at the linoleum remark. He just couldn't help it. "Mm. Brooding," he agreed. "I'm surprised neither one of them tried eyeliner and writing bad poet - No, I take that back. Sirius did write bad poetry, but only once, thank Merlin."
He shook his head. "Harry," he said slowly but with real honesty and warmth, affection and love once he got through to it. "was a lot like Sirius. I think they were both influenced heavily by Lily and James," he admitted. "And neither of them was ever really a child or was allowed to grow up. What," he asked, suddenly. "Do you think Harry would be like now?"
Ginny took a moment to think about that. "It could've gone a couple of ways, I think. His whole life was driving toward one terrible purpose; what happens when that purpose is fulfilled?" She paused, and got a faraway look in her eyes. "It was hard enough on the rest of us, trying to settle into something like a 'normal life' after spending most of our useful lives preparing for battle. To try to do that when you're the one everyone had hung their hopes on--- well, it would've been a bit maddening, wouldn't it?"
She propped her elbow onto the seat of the chair, rested her head against her hand, and looked at Remus. "But the thing is, for all that he got accused of being full of himself with all that 'Chosen One' stuff, I never knew him to have a big head about anything. So I think he would've shrugged off the acclaim and got down to doing the thing he'd always wanted most of all, which was to have a proper family he could love, and be loved by." She looked a bit misty-eyed. "And then, from that position of strength, he'd continue to find ways to fight evil and injustice, because it was his nature to do so." She gave a small but definitive nod. "I do wonder whether we'd still have Umbridge if he were here to do anything about it."
"I doubt it," Remus admitted honestly. "Both because I don't think Harry would have stood for it and because I think if he was here there would have been more resistance from the general populace." He looked thoughtful for a bit. "As for Harry - You're probably right. You knew him better than I did, but he did want a family, and a life. He was so very willing and capable, but he never really wanted to be more than Harry. I wish he'd had the chance."
And that, ultimately, was why he was being so overly tolerate of Draco, Remus thought. Or at least tolerant. He should really examine his motives more closely at some later point. If he had time.
Ginny nodded, fervently. "He's the main reason I'm here, you know. At Hogwarts. I've got no illusions that I'm a natural teacher, like Hermione or... or even like he was, but.... It was his home, the place he loved the most, and I wanted to... to keep it safe. For him, and for Dumbledore."
Her eyes glinted with a hint of mischief. "And if, in the process, I can use my strengths to help instill a certain... independent spirit... into our students, well, I think they'd both approve."
"You're a good teacher, Ginny - a very good one." He meant that, completely. "Loving the school, teaching the students to think for themselves are good things. I think Harry would have approved. I know I do."
Ginny smiled. She couldn't help it. "That means a lot to me, coming from you. And not just because I know you're not blowing sunshine up my arse." More seriously, she added, "I do try to do right by my students."
She paused, as thoughts of the upcoming school year led her to another train of thought. After a moment, she asked almost absently, "Do you dance, Remus?"
He was so completely startled that for a moment his impression of a confused puppy came close to including a whine with the wrinkled forehead and head cocked to the side. "Do I what?"
Ginny bit the inside of her lip, stifling a laugh. "You know. Dance. That thing where you move to music, and sometimes other people are involved, too."
His reaction had probably already answered the question she was really considering, but now she was desperately curious to hear him answer the one she actually asked.
"I've heard of it," he informed her seriously, then laughed, warmly.
And gave her a real answer. "I dance, though my skills are probably somewhat outdated."
"Well, my first dance lesson was with Professor McGonagall, so I'm sure I hardly outstrip you there." Ginny grinned.
"See," she continued, choosing her words with a bit more care, "Neville made me promise that I'd do something, between camp and the start of term, to blow off a bit of steam. And it occurred to me that I'd enjoy your company. It doesn't have to be dancing," she added hastily. "The cinema, maybe. Or... kickboxing. Something."
He blinked at her while he processed. "I am not kickboxing," he said firmly. "Neville's a smart man. You need to do something to blow off steam and so do I. How about dinner, a movie and dancing? We'll make an evening of it, and if we get through it without blood shed I'll think about letting you set Draco on fire." He sounded serious, somehow, though he really wasn't. Probably.
"Meanwhile, I'll teach you how to make one of these." He tapped the map against the seat of the chair he was leaning against.
As Remus made his counteroffer, Ginny's smile grew wider and wider; she was positively beaming when he got to the bit about the map. "You're on," she said happily. "All of it. Especially setting Draco on fire."
"I said think about," he warned, and pushed himself up. "And don't tell him I said that." He held his hand out for her.
"Of course not," Ginny agreed. "And anyhow, I'm mostly joking. Even if it would be rather satisfying." She smiled up at him and took his hand.
He pulled her up. "I'm mostly joking, too. I'm also resisting the jokes I want to make about Malfoy and flamming with every bit of my remaining strength and good sense. Run while you can."
"Now, that's just the sort of thing I normally run toward---"
Draco flinches with each rock, though he knows his shields that he keeps throwing up will hold, and he keeps moving. He weaves through the doors of Hogwarts and down the halls to Remus' rooms.
He comes to a screaming halt and pounds loudly on the door. "Let me in, please. Another mad professor on my tail!"
Remus shoots Ginny a frustrated look, walks to the door and pulls it open for Draco. Looks directly past him. "Hagid!" Remus, barks. Then he spins around and narrows his eyes at the dog that rushes in, blinks a couple of times and gives Hagrid a peculiar look. Shakes it off and goes on. "I know he's here. Minerva knows he's here. He's meant to be here. Stop trying to murder him."
Under Remus' scrutiny, Truffle yips and runs off through a wall.
Hagrid, puffing like a steam engine, looks around in confusion. "He... you... wha?" Leaning heavily on his cane, Hagrid puffs. "I... wasn't... gonna... kill him.... Just... thump him a few times... and bring 'im here."
He takes a deep breath to get his breathing under control and wipes his brow. "So. Why is the little tosspot here and not on his way to Azkaban?"
"He's not in Azkaban because he's been feeding Alastor information about his aunt's movements for years, and he's here because he seems to have adopted me as who to hide behind when people confront him."
He rubbed his eyes. "Speaking of which, Hagrid." He smiled. "You're going to have a guest while Camp is in session."
Hagrid had learned long ago that Remus doesn't have a sense of humor about this sort of thing, so he squelched the initial "you're joking!"
He looks over Draco. "Your disguise didn't fool me, boy, and there's a lot smarter than me folks comin' ta visit." He looks over at Remus and Ginny. "Unless he's gonna spend all week in my house, you two need to work him over more." He faces Remus and tells him. "He can stay, but you're holding his wand."
Draco resisted the urge to stick his tongue out at Remus or to even quote Remus back to himself as he sat and let his heartrate slow down.
At Hagrid's comment he resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He was beginning to feel like a teenager all over again with all his urge-resisting. "I've slowly come to realize that what worked well for me on the continent is pants for me here at home. However, you can't work me over for several reasons. First, Gringott's already deals with Marius Noir and has a history with Marius Noir and altering my appearance any further, especially magically, will not get me back in those doors. I need to appear to be in a key destructive place to be able to get Aunty to give me more information and appear to be useful to her. Secondly, so far being at least mildly recognizable has worked in my favor more often than not. Even when being chased down by overzealous Gryffindors." Draco smirked at this, he was enjoying getting away with the overuse of the phrase overzealous Gryffindors. Perhaps it was childish, but everyone had to have a hobby that wasn't likely to kill them. "Thirdly, it took me forever to get this color to stay and get used to it, you're not touching my hair or all bets are off."
Here, Draco's face grew more serious. "As for taking my wand away from me, forget it. I'm very grateful for the safety which staying at Hogwarts grants me and recognize that it is in exchange for the potential use that you'll get out of me if I can help capture my crazy Aunt. However, my wand will be removed from me over my dead body. And as that hasn't worked before, unless you're willing to use the killing curse on me right here and right now, I don't think it will work again." Draco huffed after his little rant and stared at the three who stood opposing him, almost daring them to try. His wand was still out and at the ready. He trusted Remus to not kill him. After all, he'd had more than enough opportunities in the last week, why wait until now? The others, though, especially that fiery Weasley ... well, all bets were off there.
"Draco you have thirty seconds to put that thing down or I will remove it from your dead body. If I even hear an allusion to you threatening the safety of anyone here I will snap your neck and give Hagrid your body to feed to whatever creatures he may know in the Forest that would appreciate the meal. I am not joking. Put it down now."
There was no hint of anything but flat out demand there. "And it may interest you to know that before that stunt I had no intention of asking you to give up your wand, your identity or your job. You've now just assured that I trust you not at all. Congratulations." He could not remember the last time he'd been this angry. There was no waver, no nothing. "As it stands, one wrong step, and you are done. Do you understand me?"
Draco took his first ten seconds to calm down before he gave the werewolf in front of him any more bait than he already had. He lowered his wand and stared at Remus, steeling his face to not show any feelings, even the minor ones of betrayal fluttering through his stomach. He took the next ten seconds to not rise to the bait of the minor Draco baiting that Remus had just thrown out, consciously or otherwise.
"Whether or not you trust me now, I trust you and I did trust you not to remove my choices from me. You've managed not to do that for the last week just fine. However, I think, if you do a little calm comparison that you probably wouldn't be terribly inclined to let go of your own safety if you'd just been chased down not once but twice by people who have every reason to hate you without listening to word one coming out of your mouth. And perhaps," Draco let his nostrils flare rather than let a single tear escape from his eyes, "you'd be just a bit tetchy about one of those people demanding that you let go of that instrument of safety after having spent the better part of the last half hour running from that same persons well-aimed boulders."
He took a deep breath, closed his eyes for a single second and stared Remus down again. If he didn't show his own strength in logic and reason now, he'd never be respected ever again. "That having been said ... I understand every single word you've spoken, including the way you so easily throw trust away after a few moments of frustration. I understand that your loyalties do not expand to include me and I think I even understand some of the history leading up to that. I would expect nothing less and think nothing less of you as a result."
Draco swallowed, his throat was beginning to dry up and if he didn't get somewhere else soon, he was going to cry. Dammnit. He was twenty-seven years old, noone should be able to make him cry like he was sixteen all over again. "I would appreciate being able to gather my things, including my papers. I would appreciate it, then, if you would let me take my things and return back to the flat where you found me. I'll work with you, if that's what you want ... but it's become clear that perhaps staying here wasn't the brightest idea this former Slytherin ever had."
"You do not, ever," Remus said, staring back at Draco, steady and still angry, "Pull a wand on someone in their home and then complain that they do not trust you. I understand the need for you to keep your wand and I have no desire to take it for you but you do not earn trust at wand point, or 'throw trust away for a few moments of frustration'. I expected, and expect, better from you. " He was, definitely, angry. There was a growl in his voice, but he wasn't snarling and his voice for all the growl was still level.
"You are not going to return to your flat, because you can not. It was entirely possible that I was seen arriving and leaving. Your aunt would immediately want to know why neither one of us was dead. Draco," he said eyes flicking to Hagrid. "Will keep his wand until or unless he gives us reason to remove it." He looked back at Draco. "Which includes another stunt such as the one here and attempting to force anyone to bend to your will. You believe you are on our side. I happen to believe you, but you need to understand that that is not the perception others will have and if you want trust you will have to earn it."
He took a deep breath, stretched the muscles of his neck and continued to look at Draco, eyes locked and focused. "Stay with Hagrid. Keep your job, your appearance, and your wand, but do not for one instant doubt that you have the inalienable right to abuse or threaten anyone here. This is my territory, you will not stare me down or threaten me, or anyone else here, into complying with you. You may find, however, that with time they will work with you."
Draco swallowed. Why couldn't you just let me run off and lick my own wounds? Why? Why? Why? Paris was looking better and better by the minute. He knew, though, that if freedom really was his ultimate goal, then he needed to tough things out and that it had the potential to only get worse, not better.
His throat felt tight and sounded tight, even to him, as he spoke. "Your words are more than reasonable. I would like to say one thing, though, in my defense and leave it at that. I did not pull my wand out. I never managed to put it away when I was running in with Hagrid in my wake. I can see, though, how my actions came across as attempting to force others to my will. I apologize for my allowing my extremely childish frustrations to explode all over your home."
He would not wibble. Not now. He'd wait until he had a room and one good silencing spell on that room.
Hagrid looks gobsmacked. "You're working at Gringotts? Well that's just perfect."
Hagrid looks back and forth between Malfoy and Lupin. "Wait a mo'. Why does he need to stay here if he's going to work and all? And there are going to be Aurors here when the camp starts, and probably his dear ol' dad. Seems to me he's in more danger from 'overzealous Gryffindors' here than whatever hole he was hiding in before you brought him here."
Ginny, who had positioned herself standing with one knee on the trunk in the middle of the floor, watched the exchange between Remus and Draco in wary fascination. She held her wand at the ready, but resisted the urge to keep it pointed at Draco's head.
At Hagrid's comments, she gave a small nod. "Overzealous Gryffindors, overzealous everybody. Not, mind, that I'm especially concerned about danger to Draco. But this way we can at least keep an eye on him." She shrugged. "Your call, Remus."
Remus shook his head definitively. "Not my call, not entirely. I feel better with him here, but if there's an issue and strong objection I am more than willing to have you take it to Minerva without being offended."
He rubbed his eyes, nodded at Draco's response and lowering his wand. The boy was right, he just hadn't noticed until he was snarling. "I do, however, think that in the meanwhile informing the staff is important. Ginny, that's something I need you to do," he added apologetically. "if necessary, use a well warded post and be done with it."
He rubbed his eyes. He didn't necessarily want to keep Draco here but he knew ultimately Draco wanted to be here, that being close was as much security as threat and he did *not not not* want, nor was he willing to take sole responsibility for his presence here. Hence the remark about Minerva.
Ginny nodded at Remus's request, and then regarded Hagrid with a small smile. "What do you think? Are you up to Draco-wrangling during camp?"
Hagrid sighed. "Okay, Remus. But we need to figger out, right here and now, where he's allowed to go, what he's allowed to do, what you want me to do." He turns and smiles as much of an evil grin as he can manage, "and how hard I can thump him if he gets outa line."
And with the nod as Remus' only acknowledgment of Draco's apology, it seemed to be left there.
Draco tried to appear calm. He knew he had a tendency to let his own embarrasment, hurt, and shame explode out of him in incredibly venomous ways and he knew that was the last thing all of this called for, no matter how little he wished to be staying with Professor Hagrid.
"I've been coming and going from Hogwarts' grounds to Marius Noir's day job for all of this week. I need to be allowed to continue to do that, if only to keep up the facades that will allow me to lure my Aunt into trusting me with further information. Beyond that, I can certainly agree to limit my movements on the grounds while the children are here."
"Draco's right," Remus agreed. "He's been moving about. It's probably safest for all involved if you don't go into the castle itself while there are children about, especially with your father participating, but beyond that I have no issue with him being allowed anywhere that's not generally off limits. As for thumping." He looked at Hagrid. "Please don't. "
He really, desperately, just needed this night over.
Hagrid's face is an open book reading, "this is a really bad idea at a really really bad time."
Grudgingly, "Fine. I'll see him to the gates before dawn and meet him there after sunset, and I'll march him straight to my home." He looks at Draco, sighs, and says, "and for Merlin's sake, wear a hood or somethin'."
He turns and stomps off, muttering to himself. "Can't have an acromantula. Can't have a dragon. Can't keep the skrewts. But shore, invite the Death Eater over for tea, that'll be nice."
Outside of Remus' room, he whistles for Truffle. "There ya are, ya silly pooch. Remus doesn't bite. Well, leastways not tonight he won't."
Remus stops Hagrid before he can leave entirely. The fact that he agrees with so much of what Hagrid's thinking is... actually the source of a good deal of what's making his head pound.
He opens his mouth to say something to Hagrid but closes it again, nods and settles for 'Thank you."
Ginny smiled in the direction of Hagrid's departing bulk. She couldn't help it. "And I should probably be getting on with my evening, Remus, if you have no further need of me?"
She didn't look directly at Draco, but she maintained watch on him out of the corner of her eye.
"You're free to go," he told her, aware of the echo of the Professor in his voice, though not overly so. "I have rounds I need to make, actually."
He collected the Marauder's Map and said, with simple, honest sincerity, "I am sorry that I misunderstood you Draco. Thank you for being as gracious as you were."
Ginny nodded to Draco, more to acknowledge his presence and her continued, watchful awareness of it than from any sense of well-wishing. "Evening, Malfoy," she said by way of farewell.
She levitated her trunk again and headed for the door. To Remus, she added, "If you have need of me, you know where to find me."
"Good evening, Professor Weasley." Draco knew that at least showing a modicum of respect would go a long way towards earning the respect he so desired. If he was going to have to be around these others to get to his goal, then he could endeavor to play nice.
After she levitated her trunk out the door, he looked at Remus. "Apology accepted." He knew by now he looked as tired as he felt. He took a deep breath and continued. "I'm very tired from a much longer day than I'd thought I was going to have this morning. As I'm not needed to be wrangled by Hagrid until the children begin arriving, I'd prefer to kip here until then. I can move my small amount of things over to his hut tomorrow or Sunday. That is, if it would be alright?"
He was more than happy to let Remus leave sooner rather than later, but he'd prefer to not have to move all his things tonight when he really was still on the barely controlled verge of tears.
Last modified: 4 February 2008